good steps

May. 2nd, 2017 11:32 pm
schneefink: (FF Kaylee in hammock)
[personal profile] schneefink
I'm having a few bad days and I'm strangely happy about it. Because currently, a "bad day" is eating late, making avoidable mistakes at work, not doing any household chores, avoiding interactions with multiple people, and only crossing off one item off my to-do list. Bad days used to mean skipping meals, avoiding any interaction with people, and not doing anything except read or surf the internet. Progress!

Things in general are so much easier now that I have an external structure. I always knew that setting schedules and routines for myself was something I found very difficult, but I didn't expect there to be such a big difference and so soon.
(Unfortunate side-effect: I'm getting ever more anxious about the state of the world, and now that I feel like I can Do Things again I start putting pressure on myself to try and Do Something About It. Rationally I know it's too soon but still.)

I went on a date! Two, actually. For the first time in years :) It seems to me that flirting is pretty much like normal meeting new people, except with an added awareness of potential future romance. I don't think I'll see him again, apart from in the climbing hall where we met, because it's a bad sign when it's hard to find things to talk about on the second date, but it was nice just to have the experience.

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schneefink: River walking among trees, from "Safe" (Default)
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