schneefink: (FF Kaylee excited)
schneefink ([personal profile] schneefink) wrote2015-05-17 02:09 pm

Voldemort in a pink cape

Dinner conversation between my little brother and me yesterday:

LB: I just thought about Voldemort reading the Evil Overlord List. Especially [#29] "I will dress in bright and cheery colors, and so throw my enemies into confusion."

Me: Yes! Or Emperor Palpatine. And Vader.

[brief discussion about Stormtrooper vs. Death Eater aesthetics, and which evil overlord could get away with it more easily. The mental image of Voldemort appearing in a Death Eater meeting all colorful is beautiful. Lucius could be appointed fashion advisor.]

Me: Imagine, when they're practicing against boggarts in Hogwarts, and one of the students is most afraid of Voldemort, and the goal is to make him look funny… A pink cape with flowers?

LB: Singing!

Then we started brainstorming which songs would be best:
- the "Schuh des Manitou" version of "Oh when the saints come marching in"
- "Pokerface"
- "Who wants to live forever"
- "My heart will go on"
- "If you wanna be my lover…" (we decided this was too morbid)
- dancing the Macarena
- the Voldemort rap line from Mysterious Ticking Noise
- moonwalking like Michael Jackson
- the Chicken Dance
- the dwarf dance: Hey Zwerge, hey Zwerge, hey Zwerge ho
- Voldy Style
- "Er heißt Voldemort" (The sequel Nie wieder so einen wie Voldemort comes after they won the war: "the boy was sometimes so strange, and unfortunately he lacked a soul, but sometimes I think it was a beautiful time.")

Obviously the students would need to practice a lot. And some of them have cameras. The wizarding world has moving photographs. Imagine photographs of Voldemort in a pink cape dancing in the "Daily Prophet"…
Voldemort's reaction: [Ahmed the dead terrorist voice] "I'll kill you!"

Other great ideas:
- "Maria" from West Side Story would definitely be sung by Snape, as "Minerva."
- In Voldemort's "Gangnam Style", Bellatrix Lestrange would try to be the sexy lady but Lucius Malfoy would trump her.
- In "Oppa Gandalf Style", one of the dwarves would be one lady and Thranduil another one.

Filed under: things I will miss when I move out.

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