Time is weird now

[schneefink]

Overall, I think I'm coping okay with *gestures* everything. It helps that here in Austria the lockdown worked quite well, though I'm worried about what'll happen now that many restrictions have been lifted.

Things I'm having difficulties with:
- Cleaning and tidying up and housework in general – fortunately since we don't get visitors at the moment, nobody cares.
- Going to bed on time. No idea why this specifically is difficult, but it sucks because of course lack of sleep makes everything else harder.
- Whenever I make a mistake it's hard not to immediately become very anxious. I think I'm getting slightly better but it's annoying.
- Talking to people is hard. Not to DD, but everyone else. I've been dodging some calls, I owe several people replies, not exactly sure why this takes so much more energy than usual.

Things going relatively well:
- I started setting regular alarms to drink something and it's actually working quite well, fortunately.
- I still go for a run once every week and it's nice to see how much progress I've made in only a few months.
- I always had problems studying at home, but thanks to my study group and the group project I mostly managed to keep up and am only slightly behind on everything.
- DD and I have a lot of time to cook together, which is nice. She's been experimenting with her new sourdough starter (we still haven't agreed on a name) and we had delicious bread, good pizza dough, blueberry "pancakes", quasi-Lángos… Luxury.
Btw, have I mentioned our new window box herbs? We now have oregano, thyme, verbena, marjoram, coriander, curry, parsley, chive, basil, lemon balm, two kinds of mint, and summer savory.
Edit: I forgot, we also have sage and lavender.
Next on our list: regularly make Smoothies again, because they're delicious (and incidentally also healthy.)

I'm still working from home, and probably will through May, no idea what'll happen after that. I saw my family again, that was nice. This weekend my D&D group is planning to meet again for the first time in many weeks, at least some of us, but instead of our usual D&D session we'll meet for BBQ and boardgames on a terrace large enough we can keep our distance, which I'm sure will be weird.
…aaand now I'm just procrastinating on going to bed, again.

Comments

[trobadora]

It helps that here in Austria the lockdown worked quite well, though I'm worried about what'll happen now that many restrictions have been lifted.

Yeah, I'm worrying about thot too, since they're just lifting restrictions here. But I'm glad you're doing okay otherwise!

*hugs*

[schneefink]

We'll find out more in two weeks or so, all fingers crossed!

[musesfool]

I'm glad you're doing okay!

not exactly sure why this takes so much more energy than usual.

I think that's pretty normal in crisis situations, especially like this one, where it's a thing that is definitely happening but which sometimes seems distant, and also because we don't know when it will end.

[schneefink]

True. For some reason I just didn't expect communication to be one of those things that'd be harder, idk why.

[lilysea]

Going to bed on time. No idea why this specifically is difficult, but it sucks because of course lack of sleep makes everything else harder.

All the solidarity and empathy on this one! If you find anything that helps, even if only 10%, I'd love to hear about it.

I think one of the reasons I struggle with going to bed on time is that often when I DO get to bed on time, I toss and turn and can't sleep because of

- worries/Anxiety;
- restless legs;
- low level pain that is only really noticeable when trying to sleep;
- CPAP mask distressing me

so there's a strong punishment/negative reinforcer for going to bed on time.

Whereas if I collapse into bed at 5am or 6am so tired that I am staggering and tripping over my own feet, I usually fall asleep instantly BUT that also means that I don't get enough sleep; and also that I wake up at 2pm which makes life harder...

[schneefink]

Sucks that you're struggling with that too :(

It sounds like we have different problems with it though, so I'm not sure if any of my tricks (if I had some...) would help any. I find it hard to actually go to bed and put away my phone etc., but once I close my eyes I'm very lucky in that I usually fall asleep quickly and don't wake up in the middle of the night.

[lilysea]

I find it hard to actually go to bed and put away my phone etc., but once I close my eyes I'm very lucky in that I usually fall asleep quickly and don't wake up in the middle of the night.

Yeah, I have two separate problems:

a) shutting my laptop and actually making myself go to bed, rather than just endlessly refreshing the internet checking for updates even if I am bored and there is nothing new to read. This seems to be an executive function problem and/or an aversion problem;

b) when I do manage to go to bed, difficulty falling asleep.

[michelel72]

Don't beat yourself up too much for certain tasks being mysteriously harder. Many, many people are finding the same; I've heard it's a response to trauma and to drawn-out stress. And even those of us in relatively privileged positions regarding the virus are still dealing with some amount of trauma, whether from new restrictions ... or just the loss of the world we had and expected to keep having.

I'm not really going to sleep at an especially useful time, but I naturally drift towards night-owl tendencies and I can sleep late to compensate -- as well as sign out from work midday to take a nap if necessary. Naps can be excellent. (Not everyone benefits from them, but I'm finding them very handy.)

My company just announced that we won't be going back to the office until at least July, by their current projections. It feels weird, but just knowing I can plan to be working from home for a couple of months removes some stress. Uncertainty is very stressful.

Congratulations on keeping up with the helpful stuff like running!

[schneefink]

I love naps too, but I rarely take them because I find it so hard to get out of bed again, and then lose a lot more time than I intended.
My problem with theoretically going to bed and getting up late is that I'm most productive at work before lunch, so I don't want to start too late.

I'm sure certainty is helpful! I found out today that another coworker was told she'll definitely keep working from home during May, but nobody seems to know anything for sure.

Thanks :) It helps to have a streak I don't want to break, now that I'm not training for a specific run because it was of course cancelled.

[sallymn]

It's hard... they are easing restrictions here, and while part of me is glad and I'm in probably one of the least affected places in one of the best handled countries on the planet: it's still a worry.

I usually sleep well, wake up in the middle of the night sometimes, but I've taken to 'writing' the silliest fiction in my head until I drop off again. It doesn't matter that it never gets really written because it's so silly and it seems to calm and distract at 3 in the morning (which is a wretched time to be lying awake in bed).

My dreams seem to be more vivid than usual, but I read somewhere that is normal in stressful times, and a lotof folk are having it.

[schneefink]

Sucks to wake up too early. But it sounds like a fun way to tire your brain out again, at least :) Do you then even remember what you "wrote" in the morning?

I hadn't heard that about dreams, interesting! I've had some fun ones recently too, but I thought it's just because I'm paying more attention.

[sallymn]

I rarely remember much, but it doesn't matter because I know it's pretty rubbishy, and just keeps the brain from getting 3 in the morningish, and next time I can just 'write' something else :)

I don't remember exactly where I read that, but quite a new people have mentioned their dreams have recently been more intense, so I guess it makes sense.

[merit]

I think it is very normal that people have difficulties with 'normal' things as everything is just out of ordinary. I'm waking up later and later w/o the lack of a commute.

Love the window herbs! I find fresh herbs such a delight to grow and peaceful to do some gardening. Mint tends to dominate as a heads up!

[schneefink]

We use mint for a lot - I already look forward to making lemonade again - so that's no problem. I don't do any of the gardening, that's DD's thing, I just profit from it :) And I taste-test, that's very important *nods*

[gwyn]

I wanted to say, I got my postcard and it really lifted my spirits at a time when I was feeling especially low. I hope things will continue to get a little better in your world.

[schneefink]

I'm glad :D Thanks for telling me. I hope things will improve for you too! *hugs*

[extempore]

Ich zögere das Schlafengehen hinaus, wenn der Folgetag irgendetwas Unangenehmes beinhaltet. Irgendwie glaube ich, je später ich ins Bett gehe, umso später beginnt der nächste Tag. Joa. Logik und so. -_-

[schneefink]

Ts, Logik. Hab schon mal gerüchteweise davon gehört, ist aber nie da, wenn man sie braucht.

[extempore]

Wir können halt nicht alle Spock sein!

[mllesatine]

Ich musste meinen Sauerteig erst wegwerfen, weil sich oben Schimmel gebildet hat. Vielleicht war ich nicht vorsichtig genug beim Entnehmen von Teig (Kelle dreckig).

[schneefink]

Daran hab ich noch gar nicht gedacht! Werd mal Daumen drücken (und vorsichtig sein), dass uns das nicht passiert.